|Sunday, August 27th, 2006|
Virgin4Life1138: But then again, as long as I have movies and books about my beloved Han Solo, I don't really care about "real" relationships.
|Friday, August 11th, 2006|
Tanline Girl: I was miserable yesterday/last night/this morning
Tanline Girl: and still have an icky throat, but am feeling better
Counselor: Eww, that sucks
Counselor: Give that to the Christians
Counselor: Say it's a gift
Counselor: FROM SATAN
|Saturday, July 8th, 2006|
Plastic T-Rex: Hey, are you hungry at all now?
Plastic Stegosaurus: No, not particularly, I ate chips and dip
Plastic T-Rex: Do you predict being hit by the pangs of hunger anytime in the near future?
Plastic Stegosaurus: lol, no
Plastic T-Rex: Curse your sudden but inevitable intake of food without my consent!!
|Friday, June 30th, 2006|
Tie-dye Freak: .....Haaaaair!!
Tie-dye Freak: ....Haaaaair!!
Tie-dye Freak: ...Haaaaair!!
Tie-dye Freak: ..Haaaaair!!
Tie-dye Freak: .Haaaaair!!
Tie-dye Freak: Haaaaair!!
Non-Albino Girl: ..............What?
Tie-dye Freak: HAAAAAAIR!!!
|Saturday, June 17th, 2006|
Badgered Girl: Excuse me. Please remove your digits from my anatomy.
|Wednesday, April 26th, 2006|
Probably Topless Girl: Heeeeey, go to sleep
Fully Clothed: Yaaaaaa, I'm getting there...people keep distracting me. Or like...words. Or like...myself... I keep thinking about how funny I am and then I start laughing at myself. But you know, in the good way.
|Wednesday, April 12th, 2006|
Tard: Hey, [Linda]! Are you wanting the hungry consuming?
Slash Fan: That fanfic I read was completely unsatisfying. I thought you should know that.
Non-Fic Chick: Ha ha ha.
Slash Fan: It was three chapters of just hinting that maybe somebody might possibly, but probably not, have feelings for somebody else.
Non-Fic Chick: Oh god. Who writes that way?
. . .
Non-fic Chick: Besides J.K. Rowling... Who wrote half a novel that way.
|Sunday, March 19th, 2006|
ADD Nailing Chick is hanging up posters in her room. Super Layout Girl walks in and witnesses ADD Nailing Chick putting two posters on the wall that are not lined up at all, despite the fact that they are right next to each other. A conversation ensues about how retarded ADD Nailing Chick is at making things even and ends with ADD Nailing Chick begging Super Layout Chick to help her line her posters up.
ADD Nailing Chick: If you were a true friend
, you would help me!!
Super Layout Chick: Yeah... *Walks away*
|Friday, March 3rd, 2006|
Tard: You know, 'tard' backwards is 'dart'.
Speller: Actually, it's 'drat'.
Tard: Oh yeah, 'drat', too.
|Monday, February 27th, 2006|
Breakfaster: OH MY GOD THERE'S A CONDOM IN THE PEANUT BUTTER!
|Sunday, February 26th, 2006|
Passenger: We need to mount a cannon on the car...that shoots chlymidia. But the particles would be so tiny that it would go through other peoples windows and stuff.
Drive: It'll be a CHLYMIDIA CANNON!
Drive: What we need to do is mount it on the roof...and have one of those things come down like in submarines, so you can see out the top, and fire it in all directions.
Passenger: Yes! A periscope!
Driver: And I think that whenever we fire it, it should yell "CHLYMIDIA!" so that people know they are being attacked!
Tented Tee Shirt Girl: (to Girl Wearing Skirt) It looks like a palm trees ass exploded on your legs! And then some people were like "ding dong the palm tree's dead!" and threw confetti on it!
|Wednesday, February 8th, 2006|
Flat Chested: Ew that glass of orange juice they just poured looked toxic.
DD: It looked what?
Flat Chested: Toxic.
DD: Oh, I thought you said "tausage" and I was like "is that a mix of taco and sausage??"
Lazy Bum: (watching a game show on tv) I'd be gone by now
Lazy Bum: I said I have a dong right now.
Chef: I thought you said you had a gong in your mouth.
Lazy Bum: I did.
|Tuesday, February 7th, 2006|
AIM user: You know that one cut I showed you on my stomach a few days ago?
AOL user: ya
AIM user: Well since then, they've... spread? Something is attacking me in the nightttt. And they hurt like hell
AOL user: Eww, maybe your being ubducted by aliens in the night, who are doing tests on you through your stomach
AIM user: You mean during the day?
AOL user: and then returning you to your bed...right, day.
AIM user: THAT'S why I woke up so late today! 9 PM is a bit late, even for me
AOL user: Must be the aliens
AIM user: Exactly
AOL user: OH MY GOD!MAYBE THE PEOPLE WHO LIVE ABOVE US ARE THE ALIENS!
AIM user: That would make SO MUCH SENSE
AOL user: They clunk around doing EXPERIMENTS ON PEOPLE
AIM user: AND repairing their ships!!
AOL user: and thats how they can NEVER EVER SLEEP
AIM user: They really ARE dropping anvils! OH MY GOD EPIPHANY
AOL user: OH MY GOD!
AIM user: Wow, I feel violated now. Those bastards. Blasting their stupid rap music and country and N*Sync. Alien assholes
AOL user: Aliens have weird taste in music.
AIM user: Seriously. And THAT'S why they need it so loud, to drown out the voices of their victims!!
AOL user: to drown out the tortured screams!
AIM user: Galactic pieces of shit, they are. And THAT'S why the chick STOMPS down the stairs everyday!! It's hard to walk in shoes when you have tentacle feet.
Soup Girl: One time this person was like "banana" and I was like "..Frodo?" and they were like "Yeahh.."
Sandwich Girl: ..Don't ever say that again.
|Monday, February 6th, 2006|
Giggly Girl: You know what would be even better than a giant poster of a
cockface on our wall? This.
Giggly Girl pulls up this picture:
Horrified Girl: OH MY GOD! It's like a GANGBANG!!!
The scene: After a long, hysterical conversation with Can't Stop Laughing Girl (CSLG), Supposed To Be In Bed Girl (STBIBG) goes into her room, closes the door, and prepares to change into her pajamas. As she is pulling down her pants, she hears...
(To the tune of 'Pink Elephants on Parade' from the movie 'Dumbo')
Spooky Voice: They're here...
Spooky Voice becomes CSLG: HAHAHAHA
STBIBG: What the fuck!!!
CSLG: They're here, they're there, cockfaces are e-ve-ry-where! Clippity-cloppity!
Awezome Girl #1: Especially since we can't do it now but have so many ideas, when we find the
apartment, we need to buy it and deck it out with every idea we could possibly conceive; fish bowls in the walls, posters on the ceiling, a strobe light, every wall a different color, a notepad with a pen attached on every wall...
Awezome Girl #2: Yeah, it'll be so insane that when people walk inside, they'll say, "Oh my god, how the fuck do you live?? I'm the most collected person I know and even I
can't help but be ADD when I walk in here!!"
Also, major props and awezomeness to our first official fan
(besides ourselves, of course), phrasemuffin
. We tip ours hats in your general direction.